Nice Guys Finish Last – 10 Clear Signs That Confirm You’re A Wimp

This is a fear every guy needs to get over — and get over early. If you’re 30 years old and you’ve never felt comfortable approaching women, well, it’s no wonder you’re still single. You need to develop a certain level of confidence before you get set in your wimpy ways. And being able to approach women is as basic as it gets. If you don’t, you’ll always resent your friends who dare to wander over, start the conversation, and get that first date.

Men and women are equal in every regard. But that doesn’t mean you won’t get asked to open a jar for your girlfriend occasionally. That is, if you can. With so many guys stuck behind a computer all day, some of the easiest tasks are slipping out of our ability. Don’t be that guy who has to get out a pipe wrench to open your jar of jam, or worse, get your girlfriend to open it for you.

OK, so you just finished a Law & Order: SVU marathon, and you’re feeling a little on edge and can’t get to sleep. You hear a noise. What is inside your apartment? Or was it just outside? Was that it again? Whatever it was, you can’t stay hidden under the covers like a child. If you don’t go check out that noise, who will? You’re going to look like the ultimate wimp if you let your girlfriend go. And — god forbid — if the noise did happen to emanate from something dangerous, you don’t want to stay in bed, paralyzed with fear. How’s that going to help you? Hopefully, it’s not a murderer, but if it were, you’d at least want a fighting chance. Or what if you left a burner on? You’d want to prevent that fire before it got out of control, right? A man must be able to keep his home safe, which means checking on the late-night noises.

You’ve meant to try that hole-in-the-wall taco joint for months, and tonight was finally the night. After your meal, you say goodbye to your friends and head back to your car. It’s dark. You see something in the shadows. You realize you haven’t tried this spot before because it wasn’t in the best neighborhood. Why did you have to park so far away? Who’s that over there? Are they coming your way? Why are his hands in his pockets?

Oh, it’s just an old man. Oh, and it’s cold out. Oh, and he’s walking to his car in a parking lot. Stop being afraid of the dark.

This one gives a lot of people anxiety. Many people are sick of tipping but are afraid not to tip. The food was cold, the waiter never brought you that Coke you ordered, and they took forever to bring the bill. You’re fuming, thinking, “I’ll never return here again. You know, being a waiter isn’t that hard, but somehow this guy screwed everything up. And he was rude on top of it! What a jerk!” And then you tip 17% and thank him on the way out. Way to stand up for yourself, John Wayne.

Maybe you think you’re being nice by not taking it. But the truth is, everyone else had two slices, and you only had one. You’re still hungry, and they’re just packing on the excess calories. You’re the one who paid for most of it anyway. The guy on your left gave $2.25, and the guy on your right didn’t even give a nickel. You’re staring at it — the pepperoni is calling your name. Yeah, “I’m going to take, I’m just going to take it,” you tell yourself. And then it’s gone. And you’re still hungry. Maybe if you ate more, you wouldn’t be such a wimp.

It’s one thing to share credit with your team. “It was a group effort” is always a good thing to say. But when Leroy from down the hall waltzes in and takes the credit for a job you did, that’s not good. Stand up for yourself and your accomplishments. If you don’t, who will? If your coworker steals your thunder this time, what about next time? And what happens when your boss gives Leroy that promotion over you because you let it slide that once? You don’t want to have to report to a guy named Leroy.

Stand up straight. Clear your throat. And now say, “Excuse me, but there’s already a line here.” Not so hard, was it? And you know what? That one jerk who tried to cut might think you’re a dork for telling him what’s what, but those other ten people waiting in line with you will think you’re pretty badass. And you’ll feel better about yourself, too. Nothing is more haunting than letting a line cutter get away with it. I still remember that one time back in ’04 at the west side KFC…

It’s karma. What goes around comes around. It’ll all even out in the end. Guys say that when they’re too nervous to tell a cashier, they provide the wrong change. It won’t even out in the end. You’re just going to keep getting short-changed. Why? They made an honest mistake. Tell them.

Sure, maybe it takes you a while to formulate your opinion. You want to think it over before saying anything. Now they’ve changed the subject, and my point is irrelevant? Speak up! People willing to speak up for their ideas and opinions are valued. You’re remembered. Speaking up makes it seem like you have conviction. Guys who won’t stand up for their beliefs will be seen as soft or someone who doesn’t have much to contribute. Don’t be a wimp — leap with your ideas.